Bullying can happen to anyone, anytime, anywhere. It can take the form of physical, social, verbal or cyber. It can be hard to identify or to know when to intervene. What distinguishes bullying from common teasing is the deliberate, repeated action from someone who has power over another person.
My son David was in 5th grade when redistricting brought him to a new school. At 5’ 2’’, 130 pounds, David was a gentle giant. Shy and introverted, making friends was a constant struggle. A group of kids took interest in David for all the wrong reasons.
It started with teasing, then name calling, excluding David from the group activities and picking on him for not fighting back. David came home from school every day complaining. As his mother, I told him that it was okay to stand up for himself and tell the teacher. I wanted to empower David and give him the opportunity to face his Goliath.
In the case of David, I should have intervened sooner. As a parent, guardian or caretaker of children, it is best to say or do something at the first signs of teasing, thus preventing things from escalating into bullying. Bullies thrive where there is no supervision or consequence for their behavior. The website StopBullying.gov shares some of the warning signs a child is being bullied, such as:
- Is afraid of going to school or other activities with peers
- Appears sad, moody, angry, anxious or depressed when they come home
- Avoids certain places
- Acts differently than usual
- Has trouble sleeping or has frequent bad dreams
There is a fine line between teasing and bullying. Knowing what to look for in a child will help you gauge whether or not to intervene or probe further. Do you feel empowered to recognize the difference between teasing and bullying and to intervene when appropriate? Please share your thoughts.
